Questions, No Answers

"Mrs. McMichael, this is Nurse Nancy at the OB-GYN. I have your test results. Your progesterone level was 13.1 which is a little low. And your beta was 0.5.......so you are not pregnant. Your doctor will call you later to discuss what you need to do next. I'm sorry..."

Why is this happening to me? What have I done to deserve this? Why is it that people get pregnant all the time on ACCIDENT and I can't even get pregnant on fertility drugs??? I thought this was supposed to be easy. I thought I could have a baby when I decided I wanted one. I thought it was rare for people to not get pregnant the first few tries on their own. What did I do wrong? Why didn't it work like it was supposed to? Why Why WHY!!!!!!

When will I wake up from this nightmare?

Because everybody's doing it!

I know, I know. TWO posts in one day. I'm overcompensating for not posting yesterday!

So I wasn't really tagged. It was one of those "if you are reading this, TAG!" But nevertheless, here goes:

8 things I am looking foward to:
1. Hmmm....this is tough....maybe GETTING PREGNANT and having a baby!
2. Brad getting a better job
3. The boys' baseball game tonight
4. Going to the beach with Brian, Jenn and whoever else wants to go!
5. Bunco next month
6. Singing a new choir song in a few weeks
7. Decorating a nursery
8. Picking up Bella this afternoon


8 things I did yesterday:
1. Worked
2. Sang my tushy off in praise team practice and choir practice
3. Stayed up until almost 11pm playing Phase 10 with my buddies
4. Wondered if my bloodwork Friday would be able to tell me if I'm pregnant...
5. Went home for lunch and ate a salad and Pizza Rolls! Yum!
6. Thought that I should probably wash my car in the near future
7. Finished watching Tori and Dean on my DVR
8. Stuffed my face on anything that was an arms-length away


8 shows I watch:
1. Grey's Anatomy
2. Desperate Housewives
3. The Bachelor/The Bachelorette
4. The Challenge (RW/RR) on MTV (I'm a loser, I know)
5. Baby Story
6. Survivor
7. American Idol
8. Tori and Dean: Home Sweet Hollywood


8 people I tag: (From my Follower's List...)
1. Laura Sue
2. Janae
3. Kristen
4. Leslee
5. Allie
6. Kelli
7. Emily
8. Peta-maree

Doesn't a cupcake sound delicious right now?

I meant to blog yesterday....really I did.....but my mind was just overloaded....overloaded with thoughts......of......

this......


and this.....


and this.....


and this...



Why can I NOT stop thinking about food all day and night? And I'm not just thinking about food, I'm eating it! Non-stop. No wonder one of the side effects of Clomid is weight gain! I can't stop eating!!

Bloodwork tomorrow. I wonder if cd21 is too soon to check my beta level....

Back home

Can I just say that I LOVE three day weekends? Love them! Brad and I left for the beach Friday after work. We ate and ate and ate allllll weekend. And even though we thought it was going to rain all weekend, it only rained early Saturday morning. So we actually got to go lay out at the beach! I read an entire book in one day! I'm not a big reader, so that's a big deal. And I highly recommend the book, Belly Laughs by Jenny McCarthy. It's fabulous.

I fully intended on taking tons of pictures this weekend, but whenever the mood struck me to take some, my camera never seemed to be around. Oh well, there's always next time!

I go to the doctor Friday (cd21) for some more bloodwork to make sure I ovulated. But I'm 99% sure I did because I've been charting my bbt. In fact, I'm pretty sure I ovulated Friday. But I'll let you know what they say, either way!

Happy One Year Anniversary to US!

Has it really been a whole year since we said "I Do!"? I can't believe it. I guess time really does fly when you are having fun!

To my husband:

I love you SO MUCH. I don't know where I'd be without you. You make me a better person. You are my soul mate and my better half. Nothing makes me feel more loved than when you wrap your arms around me. I can't wait to see what God has in store for the rest of our lives. Happy Anniversary babe! I LOOOOOOVE YOU!!

Griffin's Kindergarten Graduation

My oldest nephew graduated Kindergarten this morning! He was the cutest one up there, if I do say so myself. I feel so old. It seems like just last week I was holding one of April's legs as she was pushing...and I almost hit the floor! Memories....... He looked like a little grown up in his tie and vest. It made me so sad! He is growing up so fast! Ok, I'll quit whining and show the pictures!

Griffin right after he received his diploma


His entire class (And btw, the graduation was at Valley View-so that's my church in the background!)


Isn't he the cutest Kindergarten graduate you ever saw?!?


Josh, Griffin and April

Griffin with MiMi and Pop (Mom and Doug)

Griffin and I

We are off to Gulf Shores as soon as we get off work this afternoon. I can't WAIT!!!!! Even though it's going to be raining the ENTIRE WEEKEND, I don't care as long as I can eat Sea-n-Suds at least once a day!! And our ONE YEAR ANNIVERSARY is Sunday!! Yay for us!

Bad dog

Want to know what happens when you leave a bag of Bunco garbage sitting on the kitchen floor while you go to church? If Bella is home, this is what happens...



My beautiful WHITE dog turned into my not-so-beautiful white and RED dog after she ate left over Jello desserts. This is her oh-crap-I-can't-hide-the-evidence face...

I really wish I had a video camera recording her as she tore open the garbage bag. And then when she realized what a mess she made! I guess we learned our lesson about leaving trash out!

Ultrasound Results

This was my very first ultrasound, so I had no clue about what to expect. I layed back, feet in stirrups, the ultrasound lady began the procedure....."My, you have a very full bladder. You get to go to the bathroom!!" So I had to shimmy down the hall with sheets around my naked hiney to the potty! WHY didn't any one tell me I had to have an empty bladder BEFORE my ultrasound???

We began the ultrasound AGAIN....I had one really big follicle, one medium sized follicle and several little follicles on my right ovary. I had about 10 little follicles on my left ovary. My doctor said that the little and medium sized follicles will not mature enough to work. So we've got ONE! That's good news and bad news in my book. Good news that I won't have sextuplets, but bad news that I just have ONE shot.

My doctor said, "It can happen at any time now so you need to have coverage every other day." Coverage?? Just say it. SEX!

I will go back next Friday for some MORE bloodwork to see if I ovulated or not. Grow little follicle! GROW!!

I found it!

My mind, that is. I took my last pill Friday. I still wasn't my normal self Saturday, but on Sunday I was me again! Thank the LORD! Clomid makes me crazy! And aside from being out of my mind, the dizziness is completely gone, too! Now let's just hope it worked! My ultrasound is in two days!

We have a new preacher! Brother Billy was voted (almost) unanimously to become VVBC's new head guy! I LOVE him and his wife!

The Bachelorette premieres tonight! I am SO excited about that. And speaking of tv, did anyone watch the Desperate Housewives and Survivor finales last night? I stayed up until 11:00pm watching both of them! And it was SO worth it! Juicy stuff!

I am hosting Bunco tomorrow night! Brad and I spent alllllll day Saturday cleaning the house. Not that my house is that dirty, but I'm talking Spring Cleaning people! Tonight my hubby is going to be getting the yard in order! The grass in my backyard is about as tall as I am!

And one last thing.....

I want to wish a very Happy 7th Anniversary to my big sister!!

I've lost my mind.

Have you seen it? Because I can't find it anywhere! I've gone completely crazy yall. Off the deep end. No memory what-so-ever. Did yall watch Grey's Anatomy last night?? You know how Izzie would have a conversation with someone and then like five minutes later she would ask the same questions? Yeah, that's me. Here are a few examples:

I forgot to watch American Idol on Wednesday to see who got kicked off. On Thursday morning, when Beverly got to work, I asked her who got kicked off. I swear I swear I swear she said that Adam got sent home. But that's not what she said!! The entire conversation, I heard her saying Adam got the ax, but she was saying Danny! And then I apparently had an ENTIRE CONVERSATION with April about how Danny went home and if we thought Adam or Kris would win. SO don't remember that! So last night when I went to Benkei with my Mom and Katie, I brought up American Idol and said, "I can't believe Adam went home! What a shock!" They both looked at me like I was nuts! And I am apparently!

For lunch today, April and I ate at La Gran. The waiter came up to ask us what we wanted to drink, we told him, then he started walking off to go get our drinks and I stopped him to get him to take our order. "We want cheese dip and steak and chicken fajitas for one. Oh, and some cheesedip. Did I say cheese dip already?"

What is WRONG WITH ME PEOPLE!!!!!!! I'm nuts!

And when I read up on the side effects of Clomid, I saw that one of them was being overly emotional. Well I rarely EVER cry, so I figured I would get a little teary eyed while on Clomid. Umm, no. Instead of sadness, I have RAGE! I'm talking intense anger folks! I got so mad at my blog when I posted yesterday because it wouldn't put the pictures where I wanted them and if I had a gun, I probably would have contemplated shooting my foot off.

So if you see my EVER-LOVING MIND around somewhere, would you mind giving it back to me?? THANK YOU!

Peyton's Graduation

My nephew, Peyton, graduated from preschool today! His class sang some songs for us and they were all so cute in their little caps and gowns!

He's so stinkin cute!

Peyton with his Mom and Dad

April and I

Peyton and Aunt Farse!

After work, I am going to get Reece and we are meeting my Mom for dinner at Benkei!! YUMMMMO!

I woke up this morning and couldn't remember taking my Clomid yesterday....'Surely I took it.' I told myself. I sat there and sat there and could NOT remember taking the thing!! I jumped up out of bed and went to the kitchen and pulled out the pills....1, 2, 3...THREE!!! Crap I forgot to take one!!!! Oh wait, no there's only two. Thank GOD! Ok, I'm on track, everything's ok. Whew. The big C is messing with my head....Can you tell?

Fishing, and of course a little Clomid

I forgot to post these pictures a few weeks ago. My Mom's birthday was April 25th, so she decided that she wanted to go fishing. Brad and I both went with her and my step-dad, Doug. We caught around 100something fish in five hours!

Mom wanted me to kiss the fish for the picture, but I couldn't do it. That's just nasty!


My hubby and I fishing



So today is day 3 on Clomid. I'm still having the dizzy spells but that's the only symptom! I'm SO thankful for that! I just hope I don't get any more symptoms as time progresses. I've been reading up on the Steece's and other parents of multiples to see what treatment they used to get pregnant. I've found several QUAD mothers that got pregnant with their QUADS on their first run of Clomid-the lowest dose. What in the world would I do with FOUR BABIES?!? I'm almost freaking out now that I really think about it.........but ultimately four would be better than none at all. I am trying to not worry about the possibility of multiples until I have a reason to.

Tomorrow is my nephew, Peyton's, preschool graduation! Stay tuned for pictures tomorrow!

I'm a slow quilter

I am half way finished with my Baby Safari quilt top. I have about zero motivation to quilt right now. I don't know why. But I'm forcing myself to finish it soon! Here are the updated pictures as of this morning:

Hopefully, I'll be done with it this weekend!

In Clomid news, I'm not really having the symptoms I thought I would be having. I know it's only day 2, but so far I'm making it! The only symptom that I have that is a little bothersome is the dizziness. And that only happens a few times a day. So I'm just taking it day by day. My ultrasound is next Wednesday....please pray that everything looks good!

Happy Mother's Day!

I know I'm a day late, but the reason I'm late posting is because I was spending time with my MOM! After church, Brad and I had lunch with his mother and his side of the family. Then we went over to see my Mom! I really looooove my Mom. She's one of my very best friends and has been since the day I moved out of her house! Ironic? I love you Mom! You are the BEST mother in the entire world and you did a wonderful job raising me :o)

Mother's Day was a little different for me this year. I almost felt like people in church were staring at me, thinking 'Oh poor thing. I know she feels bad today.' Especially when the preacher said he realized that a lot of us in the congregation were struggling with Mother's Day because we wanted so badly to be a mother and couldn't be right now.

Today is day one of Clomid. Wish me luck!

Our test results

Remember all the instructions I told you there were regarding Brad's SA? Well here they are, along with everything else that's happened today! The nurse told us that we had to abstain for three days so we could get a good sample. Then once we got the sample into the teeeeeeeeny vial (inside the cardboard holder in the previous post) we had exactly one hour to get it to the lab. We live about 30 minutes away from the lab AND I had to drive through school traffic this morning to get there and I made it with 10 minutes to spare!! Oh, and did I mention that I was instructed to 'keep the vial warm' until I got it to the lab? The nurse told me I had to put it between my boobs as soon as we got the sample until the time I saw her at the lab! As I was driving in to town this morning, I couldn't help but feel like everybody on the road knew exactly what I was doing and what I had hidden you-know-where....

So the results came in from his test and my bloodwork from yesterday. He is fine, I am not. Surprise! We knew that. My TSH (thyroid stimulating hormone) was 0.02. The normal range is 0.32-5.00. And my doctor said that that basically confirms his assumptions that I'm just not ovulating correctly. So we got the green light on Clomid. Now we just have to wait for AF. I will take 50mg on days 3-7 and have an ultrasound done on cd12. I can't wait!!

It's Show Us Where You Live FRIDAY!

Head over to Kelly's blog by clicking the button above to see everyone else's rooms! This week, we are showing off our living rooms!

My favorite room in the house! We just finished painting it green! I love everything about our living room! (Notice The Catch on the wall? Marriage is about compromise, right?)

Brad plans on getting a 52 inch flat screen as soon as that tv goes out!

And every living room needs a cute little furry baby in it!

I also love my vaulted ceiling! But I did NOT love painting it!

Brad and I could live in those recliners. Seriously. They are like sitting on clouds. In fact, I'm sitting in mine as I type! :o)

Here is Bella's toybox that stays in the living room. She loves her Santa Claus no matter what time of year it is!

Remember me talking about this picture? What do you think? It's my favorite part of our living room!

And because I was in no mood to blog last week, I'm a week behind! Last week was kitchen week, so here's mine!


I love that I can wash dishes/cook (haha, right?) and look out into the back yard. One day, I'll be able to watch my kids play in the backyard!


The table we have eaten at maybe 5 times!



I love my cabinets...I just wish there were more of them!


And a couple of the more sentimental pieces in my kitchen are the three feathers I have that I got each of the three years I went to Honduras on a mission trip.

I hope to have the opportunity to get many more feathers from Honduras!

And last, but not least, what kitchen would be complete without an autographed picture of David Copperfield on the fridge??

Now it's your turn! Show the bloggy world your living room! (And kitchen if you are lazy and didn't do it last week like you were supposed to!)

I'm SO excited!!

I know I said I would post to the post I wrote this morning, but this deserves its very own post! I explained everything that has been going on to my doctor (that we have been trying for three months, but mainly the 47 day long cycles) and he didn't like that at all! He said that women ovulate around 14 days before their period starts and with me, by the time I actually ovulate, my uterine wall isn't able to support an embryo. So it's virtually impossible for me to get pregnant with such long cycles. That's the bad news. But there is suuuuuch great news, too! He is going to put me on Clomid!!! So I had to have some blood drawn for some tests to make sure nothing else is wrong AND Brad has to give a specimen for a semen analysis.

Is that thing scary or what?!?

There are allll kinds of instructions for that thing! But I'm going to leave all that for another post! Anyway, he also said that normally he likes to put women on the pill for a month so they can have one good cycle to get the body back in rhythm before putting them on Clomid, but he wants to just go ahead and try the Clomid for a month and see what happens! So if everything with my bloodwork and Brad's semen analysis comes back ok, we will start! I just hope we can hurry and get all the tests and everything done so that I can start it this next cycle. So far, AF hasn't shown up....let's keep it that way until we get the go ahead from my lovely, wonderful, oh-so-my-favorite doctor! I haven't done much research on Clomid yet. Any advice IF ladies?

D-Day

Today is the day I've been waiting on for two months! My doctor's appointment! Halleluah! I took a test Tuesday morning and it was negative.....and then I took a test this morning and it was negative, too. So I guess I need to convince myself that I'm not pregnant this cycle. And the ironic thing is, I think AF will be knocking on my door today. I hope she waits until AFTER my appointment, because I will most definitely be scheduling a new appointment if that happens. Did I mention that today is CD46????? Is that torture or what? I really hope my doctor can do something about these looooooooooooong cycles. They are killing me! And I'm going to chart my bbt next cycle, too. So maybe that will help us get pregnant! I'll post the results from my appointment on this post later today, so stay tuned!!

How did this turn into a post about April's kids?

Yesterday afternoon Brad and I picked up Reece from daycare to spend some time with her. I took some pictures with my camera phone but I have NO clue how to get those on here. We had dinner at O'Charley's with our friend Jacob and then we headed over to Northport to watch Brad's nephew play baseball. Reece loved watching the game and was a perfect angel the entire time! I could just eat her up!

And I am SO happy to tell you that Griffin loves me again. Around Thanksgiving, Griffin was eating a piece of ham and I walked up to him and got a bite of it. He got SO mad at me and has barely spoken to me or had anything to do with me since! In the past week or so, he's turned a corner and decided that he likes me again! I'm so excited!

Peyton, on the other hand, worships the ground I walk on and always has! I love that kid! He was with me when I bought the paint for my living room (around 2 months ago?) at Home Depot. April liked the color so much, she decided that she wanted to paint her bathroom the same color, so when I brought her my left over paint Peyton tells everyone in the room, "Allison bought that paint at Home Depot. I know, I was with her!" How does he remember stuff like that?

I go to the doctor tomorrow! YAY! I don't think I have ever been this excited to go to the gyno! :o)

I'm still here.

I haven't gone anywhere. I just don't have much to say. There isn't anything on my mind, other than the fact that I want a baby and can't have one right now. And I'm sure most of you are tired of hearing me complaining and crying about that. I still have a glimmer of hope that I might be pregnant, but who knows? I am going to the doctor on Thursday and hopefully he will be able to give me a definite answer then. At least I'll know then and won't have to keep guessing. Maybe I'll be more chipper tomorrow...